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Ogden NashHow courteous is the Japanese; He always says, "Excuse it, please." He climbs into his neighbor's garden, And smiles, and says, "I beg your pardon"; He bows and grins a friendly grin, And calls his hungry family in; He grins, and bows a friendly bow; "So sorry, this my garden now."
-Ogden Nash (The Japanese)
Also,
(SMOOT PLANS TARIFF BAN ON IMPROPER BOOKS - News Item)
Senator Smoot (Republican, Ut.) Is planning a ban on smut. Oh rooti-ti-toot for Smoot of Ut. And his reverend occiput. Smite, Smoot, smite for Ut., Grit your molars and do your dut., Gird up your l__ns, Smite h_p and th_gh, We'll all be Kansas By and by.
Smite, Smoot, for the Watch and Ward, For Hiram Johnson and Henry Ford, For Bishop Cannon and John D., Junior, For ex-Gov. Pinchot of Pennsylvunia, For John S. Sumner and Elder Hays And possibly Edward L. Bernays, For Orville Poland and Ella Boole, For Mother Machree and the Shelton pool. When smut's to be smitten Smoot will smite For G-d, for country, And Fahrenheit.
Senator Smoot is an institute Not to be bribed with pelf; He guards our homes from erotic tomes By reading them all himself. Smite, Smoot, smite for Ut., They're smuggling smut from Balt. to Butte! Strongest and sternest Of your s_x Scatter the scoundrels From Can. to Mex!
Smite, Smoot, for Smedley Butler, For any good man by the name of Cutler, Smite for the W.C.T.U, For Rockne's team and for Leader's crew, For Florence Coolidge and Admiral Byrd, For Billy Sunday and John D., Third, For Grantland Rice and for Albie Booth, For the Woman's Auxiliary of Duluth, Smite, Smoot, Be rugged and rough, Smut if smitten Is front-page stuff.
-- Ogden Nash (Invocation)
Who was Senator Smoot? U.S. Senator from Utah named Reed Owen Smoot (1862-1941), who is best known for a strongly protectionist tariff, the Smoot-Hawley Tariff Act of 1930; and for a fight against pornography, which led to the classic headline in many newspapers, "Smoot Smites Smut".
Ogden Nash. 1902 - 1971. American writer of light verse, known for his sophisticated whimsy and satire, dealing chiefly with the lives and interests of upper-middle-class residents of New York City and its environs. His verse, frequently published in The New Yorker, is usually written in long, rambling, meter and strained or over-simplified rhymes, in a burlesque of inferior "serious" poetry. Nash's collections of verse include Free Wheeling (1931), Hard Lines (1931), Happy Days (1933), The Bad Parent's Garden of Verse (1936), I'm a Stranger Here Myself (1938), Good Intentions (1942), Versus (1949), Family Reunion (1950), Parents Keep Out (1951), The Moon Is Shining Bright as Day (1953), The Private Dining Room (1953), You Can't Get There from Here (1957), Everyone but Thee and Me (1962), Marriage Lines (1964), Cruise of the Aardvark (1967), and There's Always Another Windmill (1968). Nash also wrote the musical comedy One Touch of Venus (1943) in collaboration with the American humorist S. J. Perelman and the German American composer Kurt Weill.
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